Divorce is an emotionally charged time for the entire family. Long-avoided arguments and resentments between divorcing spouses often come to the fore, and children may be left feeling anxious, scared, hurt, angry, or guilty.
Although you cannot shield a child completely from the effects of a divorce, you can help your children grow constructively through the experience. Keep in mind what your children need during the divorce process.
- Kids need you to stay involved. Even if you are the parent who leaves the family home, write letters and emails, make phone calls, and ask lots of questions about your child’s life. Regular contact helps children remember that they are important to their parents and they are loved.
- Kids need you to avoid fighting in front of them. Work hard to make arrangements that meet your child’s needs and minimize the amount of disruption in your child’s life – and move disputes out of the child’s sight or hearing. This helps reassure children that you care about their needs and that they are not responsible for the divorce.
- Kids need you to love and enjoy your time with them. When you spend time with your children, focus on enjoying their company – not on your frustrations about your spouse or the divorce. You’ll get a much-needed break, and you’ll help your kids stay happier as well.
- Kids need you to communicate with their other parent directly. Putting kids in the position of “message carrier” places a significant burden on them. It can make them feel responsible for protecting your feelings and those of the other parent. Instead, deal with your spouse directly, or through your experienced New York divorce attorney if no other option is available.
For further guidance through the divorce process, please do not hesitate to contact the Law Offices of Paul A. Boronow, P.C. The number is (516) 227-5353.